Going Quackers

I never wanted to be the girl who coddles stuff animals at work, but much to my chagrin, it's happened.

Dora the Duck arrived in my office a few months ago. She is canary yellow with a bright orange beak. She has a white satin bow with a red rosette in the middle, affixed to a tuft of hair on the top of her head. Her body looks nothing like a duck, more like a plush basketball you win at a carnival. Attached to her left flipper is a note that says "Dora is there whenever you need some feathers to cry on. Pass her along when you see someone in need of her ducky healing powers."

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Dora's first appeared on my boss' desk. That was the week she had to explain to reporters why a six-year-old brought a gun to his kindergarten class. He thought it was a toy.

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The next week Dora showed up in the office adjacent to mine. A few days later I asked my co-worker if I could take a closer look.
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I smoothed her feathery body. I squeezed a flipper or two. I gave her one quick tight hug.

But it didn't stop there. I took her to the fax machine. I took her to make copies. She came with me down the hall twice. She sat on my lap between me and the desk, supporting the weight of my torso as I typed. Soon I snuggled her behind the small of my back, improving my posture. Dora is orthopedic.

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On more than one occasion a co-worker or community member has walked in to find me adjusting her bow. So far no one has said anything, but I can't help but think that I've compromised my already mild professionalism.

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Yesterday, I realized that my daily abuses have taken their toll on Dora. The seams at the crown of her head have begun to split and the shreds of her cotton innards are starting to show. I am slowly destroying my closest colleague. This is what I get for sitting on her.

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Today, Dora is snuggled in her usual position in my chair. Any thought of returning her to the feel-better circuit makes me wince. My lower back has never felt better. I suppose there is something a little silly about a grown woman clinging to a bulbous duck. But that just means that I can add comic relief to Dora's list of healing powers.